Archive for the ‘Self Reference’ Category

Do sepia prints fade to monochrome?

October 16, 2009

Today, I lost a disc.
(the flying plastic kind that goes spinning through the air, dervish-like and such)

It capped off the day with a strange and off-colour emotion, like sour cream on bittersweet chocolate, if you’ll stomach the analogy.

It wasn’t a bad day and neither was it particularly good; kind of very much mostly identically similar to how they’ve been all week.

Mindless really, and emptier than usual. Less of the usual nonsense and fooling around that forms the backbone of school, more of the not-quite-drudgery-but-certainly-still-mundane. Like blurred monochrome prints, they speed past leaving quickly-gone impressions and a sense of empty longing and confusion.

So, yes, that’s what I’ve been reduced to doing in this week after promos; following the mandatory rush of post-exam activities, life has slowed to a (is it even possible) slower, stranger pace.


Metaphorically Mixed.

July 8, 2009

It’s the first day of a brand new term, but if you listen closely you can still hear the faint whoosh of half a year vanishing into the distance and the faint smudge of its quickly disappearing trail.

It really is like a tiger; you can sense its presence, perhaps out of the corners of your eyes, but never actually seeing it. Then, after an eternity of stalking, it pounces, from nowhere, and its over in a flash. It creeps up on you like a glacier; seemingly stationary, until the day you open the front door to a wall of ice.

And thus goes the end of a half-year and the beginning of another one. Common Tests are over, the scripts marked and returning. We have been weighed on the scales, and some have been found more wanting than others.

Or rather, we’ve dipped our toes in the sea and found it too chilly for our liking, but we know we’ll be swimming in it come October. In other words, it doesn’t really matter yet, but you sure as hell be ready when you’re going in headfirst.

~insert abrupt ending~
…because it’s late and I’m being hectored to sleep because we all know the youth of today surely need more than six hours of sleep a night to maintain their mental, physical, and emotional well-being. or for meaningful function of any sort at that. Just look around you for examples of the terrible fate that befalls massive sleep debtors.

In summary, CTs: yeah, sure, whatever. AAAAA—> be pleased; ACBSD—-> be slightly displeased


June 28, 2009

Irate and irascible; irked by Math

Good Music
Awesome Books
Delicious Food


Irreverent, irrepressible,but neither irrelevant nor irresponsible; the voice of the new generations

Sleepless in Singapore

June 9, 2009

What could be better  than going 40 hours without sleep without a reason? Waking up to a phone call at 2pm because your PW group arranged to meet at 1.30. This round one goes to you Yanwei

…Although the holidays thus far have been typified by the last two days. Going out, having fun, hanging out, and resolutely determining to do work and start studying without the slightest inkling of how to begin. Anyone want to entertain me?

In other news, WordPress comprehensively curtails Cyrillic-character composed comment spams


April 27, 2009

Am I really posting about nothing at all, just for the sake of updating? For the sake of pretense, for worthless self-affirmation? Or am I writing this to distract myself,  just the littlest possible bit, from the work I’ve to eventually do, in a fit of knowing-it’ll-come-back-and-bite-me-in-the-ass self-punishment?

I’m disappointed with myself for having written down a comprehensive list of things to do, resolved to do them over the weekend, and comprehensively not do them. Yay for secondary school slacker culture and JC nobody-gives-a-damnness!

Interesting KI debate today. It didn’t go very well for either side, but pretty darn good for us three judges =D Shan’t bore you with the dtails; suffice to say, KI is still rollicking good fun (OH NOEZ, TEST TOMORROW HOW); yes, it’s still all good.

~~~~I’m going into random life rambling here, so, yes, do feel free to stop~~~~

Teengames and ACS(I) dunnowhat competitions coming up over next two weekends, =D. And Labour Day weekend is going to be such excellent fun. Teengames +ACS(I) + Teengames again + Jazz concert + Sunday +It’s monday again and the week PI is due.

Unscheduled PW rant: PW can go die for real. Terrible, disgusting topics this year; Singapore is much too safe a place and the Ministry of Home Affairs is still sneakily using PW to get students to do their work and think of potential threats (probably because of money-saving budget cuts eh?) Won’t say much about conservation (although, if you ponder for a moment, what’s something, anything, that you would deem worthy of conserving in Singapore?)

Where was I? Oh, yes, competitions wheeee! And, erm, tired. Off I go lalalalalala.

ORA walk-a-jog-a-thon?

April 18, 2009

What the dickens is a “thon”? Supposing, of course, that “walk-a-jog” is a verb.

Anyway, went to school for Raffles Fest(is that what it’s called now?) and cooked in the sun. Still can’t play Ultimate because of injured knee [frustration]. And, that’s about what I did in school. Went down to Orchard for a very pleasant lunch and acquired the Oxford Companion to Philosophy, second edition; 85% off $120.

[mood: contented]

Procrasti-nation — Population:1

April 17, 2009

Good news: Finally started on PI
Bad news: 12 hours till it’s due
Worse news: I’m blogging
Worster news: Chinese zuo4 wen2

and now for something completely different

April 9, 2009

and so, the greatest British comedy sketch brings us to today’s topic, (albeit in a tortuously circuitous yet still painfully funny manner;) : human life’s definition by an “overwhelming terror of annihilation”; the meaninglessness of life and the inevitability of death

But first, why; I find myself increasingly less adept (as if that were possible) at creative production, and furtherly unaccomplished in the realms of sci-ence (now, this be shocking[!]). So I paint myself into the figurative, sticky, small corner of “humanistic thinking” and philosophy. Or, as a fellow Philosophy Circle participant put it, mental masturbation. Now, that’s philosophy. (and, yes, the first session of Philosophy Circle was good. Now we’ll see if I’ll ever get to take a peek at Writer’s Guild)

Roundabout life updates are continued HERE: Blank stares of incomprehension to rival a vegetarian zombie’s are still the standard response to thermal physics tutorials. Unwelcome sensations at nine in the evening indicate a seriously whacked body rhythm (I mean, like, dude. Who, like, sleeps, y’know, before, like, two in the morning?) Wants to go out some time with friends and just chill with nothing to do for a whole day, but doubt that’ll happen. Will settle for a few good hours of ultimate.

So, back to the issue. Let’s begin with a quote from Cicero: “to philosophise is to learn how to die”. In other words, to live well, to live the good life, is to live a life prepared for the inevitable outcome. By learning to die, and without fear, one unlearns how to be a slave (to the material distractions of the world, or inventions of afterlives engineered to escape death’s stranglehold). Neither temporary oblivion nor longing for immortality will hold any more allure.

Interrupt for SLEEP. If you happen to be reading, here are a few questions to ponder:

1) Stoicism (Google it) and “he will live badly he who does not know how to die will”; tranquility and calm in the face of death

2) What,  then, do YOU think is the good/right/noble/etc life? Is it living free of slavery to fear of death? Living free of slavery to all kinds of fear? For isn’t it fear that gives us pause, that makes us stop to reconsider?

3) If so, then consider now the existentialist. Is the way to live then being true to yourself? Is there but one path with obstacles and triumph, success and failure each in their parts? And is the best way to live to tread that very path, to do as (your) nature cries out to?

4) And then. The nobles ones. The compassionate ones. The altruistic ones. Those who give your lives and yourselves, your ambitions and your effort into others. The ones who give up their lives to be the listening ear at three in the morning. The ones who never get married in order to teach their students. Are they too afraid of living their own lives, and finding a natural path that leads to failure, that they would rather lead other lives? To invest in others in order to face one’s own.

Note: and it’s getting increasingly incoherent and unintelligable, compounded by the fact that it’s written, not dialouged. So, forgive me. Will try to work on it.

Blogger Bashdoard

April 1, 2009

Xian reflexively clicks on Blogger instead of WordPress.

about a minute ago · Comment ·

Signs of computer overuse may include:

1. Muscle memory of keyboard shortcuts and locations of bookmarks in bookmark list

2. Excessively fast touch-typing ability

3. Stumbleupon use

5. Sleep-deprivation derived befuddlement; inability to count to four.

Perhaps I am, slightly. And perhaps all of the above (typing test included) are contributing to th—why am I wasting thought, life, and, most important of all, precious sleeping time?


  • Wuthering Heights, Emily Brontë
  • The Prince, Niccolò Machiavelli
  • KI Textbook, lent to Chee Yeow
  • Draft of a PW PI Draft, [unprintable adjective] PW tutor
  • Math, Physics, Chemistry tutorials, subjects certain classmates are “catching up” on despite being ahead of the lecturers

Actually- gonna-do-list:

  • Sleep
  • A few chapters of Wuthering Heights and The Prince
  • Frisbee
  • Facebook
  • Sleep
  • Frisbee
  • CTL
  • Facebook
  • Sleep
  • Frisbee (friendly against ACS(I) at West Coast)
  • Disciple
  • YM
  • Facebook
  • Sleep
  • Church
  • Slack
  • Facebook
  • Realise PW homework is due in 15 hours
  • Sleep


March 11, 2009

…Y’know, like a zombie. Feeling unseasonably sleepy and behind with work after class camp and a few days of school; thank goodness holidays are coming up. Life update: Taking Renaissance Programme instead of ISLE, not understanding and applying ideal gas law, too lazy to move to wordpress yet.